The Indignity of It

Being occupied indoors for several weeks now, I ventured outdoors one recent, late afternoon for a breath of fresh air. The chickens were still foraging, and I was delighted to lay eyes upon them. Ah, still growing and becoming more handsome I thought of this flock which were mere day-old chicks when they arrived in a box the second week of October.

Having spied my presence on the sidewalk just off the back door stoop, they began rushing toward me. "Look, they're coming to see me!" I exclaimed with great satisfaction and feeling a wee bit puffed up that my feathered friends were eager to greet me.

Greet me, indeed. They'd no sooner encircled my feet when a Delaware rooster spied the decorative cut-out in the vamp of my leather shoes (the ones that cost more than $12, because my dear friend told me I should buy better shoes for the sake of my back, but I digress). And as chickens are wont to do when they spy an oddity, that rooster pecked a chunk out of the bitsy bit of my foot exposed by that expensive leather cutwork. *hands on hips* How rude! They hadn't come to greet me -- they'd come to eat me! Drew blood, I tell you. And I danced my way back into the house, because there were 3 more holes in my shoes, and I desired not to have red holes in my flesh to match the first shockingly acquired ornament.

Feeling now like Tippi in a Hitchcockian setting, I'm wearing my cheap chore boots (deal with it, Spine) the next time I venture out for some sun-supplied vitamin D. And woe to that Delaware rooster, for soon he'll learn we must cull most of the roosters from this flock: Heeeere, chickie, chickie, chickie.

And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness:

and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea,

and over the fowl of the air,

and over the cattle, and over all the earth,

and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.

Genesis 1:26